If you really truly desire living in a right sized body you have to separate emotions from food.
The good news is this is a skill set and you totally can learn to do this.
When you say “The situation with my kids is a big struggle right now so I stress eat…
Or we have to go visit the family for the holidays and I’m already anxious eating just thinking about it…
Or my partner and I are in a giant fight and I’m mindless eating.
My solid belief is that coming into you’re right sized body will likely NOT happen until you’re able to separate the two.
What you’re doing is using the situation or the person as an excuse to eat. You’re handing your power over to the person or situation. This is the easiest way to not take responsibility for your own behavoir.
Because here’s the deal: There are A LOT of women who get in a fight with their spouse…
Or have really big and painful situations happen with their kids…
Or have to deal with situations they’d rather not deal with…
And they don’t eat because of it.
What you’re essentially saying is my eating can’t change unless that person or situation changes.
I believe the first step in changing this starts the moment you drop the excuses and take ownership and responsibility over your own eating behaviors.
You HAVE to separate the two.
You have to be able to say my eating behaviors are my eating behaviors and I can change them whether or not the person or situation changes.
Only then, will you be able to have the capacity to make decisions for yourself around food and stop using everything else around you as an excuse.
And that doesn’t mean you always get it right, in fact…at the beginning it won’t feel easy…but what we do when we’re trying to learn this new skill is we beat ourselves up when we get it wrong.
Let’s stop doing that, okay? It doesn’t work…it actually just makes it worse.
Instead of messing up and then going into a whole story as to why you messed up and over analyze the whole thing…
A better way is to just start to notice your behaviors and emotions. Recognize it for what it was…a slip up… and learn from it.
THIS IS HOW YOU BUILD THE NEW NEURONAL PATHWAYS! One positive choice at a time, and one mess up that you choose to notice and learn from at a time.
Not by beating yourself up and over dramatizing why you put the food in your mouth in the first place.
The first step is awareness. Everytime food comes close to your mouth, stop and check in to see if you’re actually physically hungry.